the last supper

Have you ever seen Celebrity Rehab or the MTV True Life: I’m going to rehab?? One thing those former celebrities and teens have in common is this: when faced with knowing their last day to indulge in their vices, each goes on a massive bender before heading into rehab. That is pretty much what I have done over these past few days; however, my vice is not heroin or alcohol nor does it require me to risk my life in a shady part of town to get a fix. My vices are perfectly legal for all to purchase and readily available to anyone with a dollar or two, thanks to the value menu. I have eaten more carbs, more fast food, and drank more soda in this past week than I have in the last 6 months, and I have loved every moment of it. While I may know exactly how bad each of those items are for me, I was faced with 90 days of no fast food, zero beverages sweetened with corn syrup or darkened with artificial caramel coloring, and only whole grain or vegetable based carbs; I binged.

For my final binge, my “last supper,” I have chosen my favorite of favorites: Bangers & Mash. I painstakingly hand kneaded homemade Irish Soda Bread then sat while it baked for an hour before covering it with foil for its final 20 minutes in the oven. While baking, it filled the house with such a wonderfully sweet smell … if I’m going to give up white flour (for the most part), I’m going all in. It was so hard to let that beautiful bread sit and cool, I want it now!!

Next up, the bangers. Banger is really just the UK word for sausage. You can use any pork sausage you can find, I wouldn’t recommend using Italian sausage though. Given my limitations of what ethnic foods are available in my immediate area, I have chosen to use beer brats, mmmmmmmmmmm. I carefully pricked each bratwurst with a toothpick to keep them from exploding then placed side-by-side in a large, deep skillet and set the heat to medium. I like to slow cook the brats to keep them from getting that tough skin on the outside. Once I can hear them start to sizzle, I turn down the heat a little, again to keep them from over-browning while making sure they cook all the way through. OMG my house is really starting to smell good!!

While the brats are browning, I’m going to start my mash (aka mashed potatoes). Normally, I hate peeling potatoes, but today I do not mind. I peeled a ton of potatoes, sliced them into 1 inch pieces, then placed them in lightly salted water to boil on the stove until they are so tender that they fall apart at the prick of a fork. Meanwhile, my bangers are done; I moved them to a pan to keep them warm in the oven while I started my onion gravy. In the same skillet, I placed a nice helping of butter, let that melt for a bit while I sliced a very large onion into beautiful, thick rings then added to the butter, stirring frequently until they are nice and browned. Now my secret gravy: I add 1 ½ cups beer (dark beer like a lager or stout) and 1 ½ cups beef broth or stock to the onions, stir the bottom to bring up all the nice browned bits leftover from the brats, turn the heat up to med-high until boiling then lower to med-low to simmer for at least 10min until the alcohol has cooked off. If you’re not certain by sight if the alcohol has cooked off, just give it a big sniff, ummm I think I just started to drool.

My potatoes are done and ready to be mashed. The trick to really good, fluffy mashed potatoes is drying them out really, REALLY well. After draining, let them set in the sink for a good 5 min and shake up the colander a few times to make sure you’ve gotten all the water out. In a large mixing bowl, place your butter, milk, heavy whipping cream (yes I said heavy whipping cream), salt and pepper. Dump the hot potatoes into the bowl and using a hand mixer (still turned off) to mash down the potatoes. Turn the mixer onto low and with mixer in right hand and long wooden spoon in left hand, get to mashing! Make sure you continually use your spoon to stir down the sides of the bowl into the middle to get that even consistency. Once all the big lumps are gone, turn the mixer to medium and start whipping, whip at least 2-3 minutes before turning to high to get all those final tiny lumps hiding throughout.

Potatoes are done, Bangers are being kept warm in the oven, time to heat up the beans and finish the gravy. I use Campbell’s pork & beans when I’m making bangers & mash, the kind in the tomato-based sauce. Just set those in a saucepan on the stove and heat through to boiling before serving. Whisk about 2-3 tbsp of flour into your gravy, ½ tbsp at a time, until nice and thick. Add the bangers back into the gravy for a few minutes before serving while you slice up the soda bread.

Dinner is done: place a heaping spoonful of potatoes into the center of the plate, top with 2 bangers and cover the entire plate in our yummy onion gravy. Serve the beans in a small ramekin on the side, grab a fat slice of soda bread and dig in! Oh how I will miss you potatoes, see you in 90 days …

Week 1: Sunday planning

Somehow I turned needing a new dishwasher into a total kitchen remodel, yay! Unfortunately, it is taking Dan much longer to do each task than anticipated, boo!! I need my kitchen back!!!!!!!

He put in the new dishwasher and re-did the sink and garbage disposal but I’ve asked him to take a short break ripping up the bad 70s tiles that currently cover our countertops so I can get in there. For those that know me, you know how hard it is for me to live in a state of mess. These past few days have been extremely hard, to the point that I hand washed a full dishwasher’s worth of dishes and then some just because I couldn’t stand to see a dirty dish in the sink for one more moment. He kicked me out of the house yesterday to go shopping, and I’m sure the same will happen again today. For most women, you would probably enjoy a day of meandering around various stores, but to me it’s a fate worse than death. I am not one that can putter about window shopping, I go in, get what I want and leave. Yesterday was rough. I only have a short while to get my prep done before I get kicked out of the house again, so here are all the recipes that I promised yesterday.

I’m first going to make my soup and set that to simmer all day: Lentil and Tomato Chicken Soup
1 tbsp olive oil
1 cup finely chopped onion
1 cup chopped carrots
1 cup chopped celery
2 cloves garlic, minced
6 cups reduced-sodium chicken broth
2/3 cup lentils (make sure you rinse these in cold water first, sometimes they are dirty depending on where you buy them, if you get them at a farmer’s market, they’re probably still dirty)
1 tsp dried basil
4 cups chopped fresh kale (I skip this bc I don’t like it, but I’m told it’s yummy, if you can't find kale, broccoli is good in this soup too)
2 cups cooked chicken, cut into pieces
1 can no-salt-added diced tomatoes, undrained
Black pepper

In a dutch oven or stock pot, heat the oil over medium heat. Add onion, carrots, celery and garlic; cover and cook for 5-7 min until veggies are tender, stirring when needed.

Add the chicken broth, lentils, and basil; bring to a boil and reduce heat to low simmer. Cover and simmer for 10 min. Stir in kale and pepper, return to boiling then reduce and simmer another 10min.

Stir in the chicken and tomatoes, cover and simmer at least 20min … but I’m going to let mine simmer all day.

Once the soup is simmering on the stove, I’m going to make my muffins: Applesauce Bran Muffins (courtesy Lynne)
1 ½ c dry oatmeal
1 ¼ c bran flake cereal, crushed
¾ t cinnamon
¾ t baking soda
3 T vegetable oil
1 egg white
1 t baking powder
1 c unsweetened applesauce
½ c skim milk
½ c brown sugar

Preheat oven to 400. Combine all ingredients. Line muffin tins with paper cups. Divide batter equally (12 muffins). Bake for 20 minutes or until tested done.

Once the muffins are out of the oven, I’ll set them to cool and head out for the day. Planning on taking the dogs to Dunkin’ Donuts for coffee then over to the dog park then hitting up Michael’s and The Container Store. Hopefully, I’ll be able to waste more time than yesterday.

When I get back, I’m going to start my last supper, my last indulgence, then make my healthified carrot cake and get prepped for my Monday.

Healthified Carrot Cake (courtesy eatbetteramerica.com):
¾ cup all purpose flour
¼ cup whole wheat flour
½ cup sugar
1 ½ tsp pumpkin pie spice (or just mix cinnamon, nutmeg and all-spice)
1 tsp baking powder
1/8 tsp salt
1 cup finely shredded carrots (I use my cheese grater for this, it works wonders)
¾ cup chopped walnuts or pecans, toasted (toast nuts for 6-7 min at 350)
1 egg, lightly beaten
¼ cup cooking oil
¼ cup skim milk or non-fat buttermilk
Frosting: 1/3 cup fat-free cool-whip, ¼ cup non-fat light vanilla yogurt & fat/free or Neufchatel cream cheese

Preheat oven to 350. Line a 9x9x2 baking pan with foil, extending foil over the edges of the pan. Lightly coat foil with cooking spray and set aside.

Combine all-purpose flour, wheat flour, sugar, spice, baking powder and salt in a bowl. Add carrots, ½ cup of the nuts, egg, oil and milk. Stir until just combined then spread evenly into the pan.

Bake 15-18 min or until done. Cool on a wire rack.

In separate bowl, mix together the frosting ingredients and beat until fluffy.

Using the edges of the foil, lift the cake out of the pan. Frost the cake w/ prepared frosting and sprinkle w/ remaining nuts. Cut into 20 bars, these are freezer friendly if you wrap in saran wrap.

My prep for Monday will include taking chicken out of the freezer and placing on a paper towel in the fridge to defrost overnight. Then I’ll pack my muffin, yogurt and soup in my lunch bag so I don’t have to worry about getting that ready in the morning.

RECIPE FOR MONDAY: Chicken & Zucchini with Garlic
1 large onion
1 lb skinless boneless chicken breasts
Salt and pepper
1 tbsp olive oil
1 zucchini
2 cloves garlic, minced
Parsley for garnish

Cut onion into thin wedges, set aside. Halve zucchini lengthwise and cut into ¼ inch slices. Season chicken with salt and pepper.

In a large skillet, heat oil, add chicken and cook for 2-3 min, turn chicken, add onion and garlic; cook for 8-10 min longer until chicken is cooked through; stir onions often and turn chicken as needed to brown evenly.

Transfer chicken and onion to a pan or plate, keep warm. Add zucchini to skillet, cook and stir 3-5 min until crisp tender. Add to the plate with chicken and garnish with parsley.

Ok that’s it for now, must head into the kitchen and get cracking before Dan takes back over. I’ll be back online later to talk about my last supper, final fatty, carb-laden meal before my 90 day challenge.

the challenge, if you choose to accept it

I truly believe that no matter how busy you are and how many kids you have; everyone can have healthy, yummy, home cooked meals during the week. As my coworker Lynne and I begin our 90 day challenge to ourselves to eat right and exercise regularly, I invite everyone else to do the same. I’m going to give you my biggest secret for being able to cook every night without pulling out your hair: plan ahead. With proper planning, anyone can be a weeknight gourmet!

The first step is to sit down and plan your week. Review what activities you have going on that week and try to match the level of difficulty against how busy a day is. If you have a particularly busy day, plan an easy/quick meal for that night. On the evenings that you have more time, you can plan a dinner that may take a little longer to prepare and cook-ahead for the next day. My friend Shannon has a whiteboard on her fridge which she uses to plan what she is making every night, which gave me the inspiration to start doing the same. I use this little calendar specifically designed to plan your weekly menus (that I found at Michael’s for $1!). Whatever your method is, take some time on Saturday or Sunday to sit down and plan your week. It doesn’t have to be set in stone, and you can switch your nights around depending on what you’re in the mood for, it’s just important to pick 5-7 meals and write them down, creating the plan is half the battle. Executing the plan is the other half.

I just went through my cookbooks (handwritten and purchased) and reviewed a few websites. Since my goal is to cut carbs, calories and fat, I spent a lot of time on www.eatbetteramerica.com. If you’ve never seen their website, you must check it out!! One of the things I pride myself on is my ability to take the traditional foods that I grew up with and substitute a few ingredients to make them healthier. Eat Better America does all that for you in their “healthified” section, it’s fabulous.

Here is my plan for the week. First, I lay out what I want to have for breakfast, lunches and snacks all week:
•Breakfast – healthy muffin
•Morning snack – nonfat light yogurt
•Lunch – lentil and tomato chicken soup or leftovers from the night before
•Afternoon snack – whole wheat pretzels w/ reduced fat peanut butter or reduced fat cheez-its
•Evening snack - healthified carrot cake

Then, I plan my dinners ... WEEK 1: no red meat, boooo :(

•Monday Dinner – chicken and zucchini w/ garlic
•Tuesday Dinner – spicy black bean tostadas (I’m going to be extremely busy on Tuesday so I chose a dinner that I could make in 20min or less)
•Wednesday Dinner – chicken marsala
•Thursday Dinner – turkey burgers and whole wheat mac & cheese w/ broccoli
•Friday Dinner – chicken pesto pizza on homemade whole wheat crust

Once I have decided what to have all week, I go through my freezer, fridge and pantry then sit down to create my grocery list. Lynne gave me a great recipe for apple bran muffins, all you need is bran flake cereal, rolled oats, unsweetened applesauce and things you typically have in your house already (cinnamon, baking soda, vegetable oil, egg, baking powder, skim milk and brown sugar). If you’re a coupon clipper, definitely visit www.bettycrocker.com for coupons on the new Yoplait non-fat light yogurts that taste like dessert and Progresso soups if you’re not going to make a vat of homemade.

Here is the list of everything you could possibly need to pick up at the store to make homemade muffins, homemade soup and all 5 dinners listed above. I’ll post the muffin recipe, soup recipe, carrot cake recipe and Monday dinner recipe tomorrow, along with my Sunday evening tips for getting ready for your week.

Grocery list:
All purpose flour
Whole wheat flour
Baking powder
Baking soda
Sugar
Brown sugar
Pumpkin pie spice
Cinnamon
Basil
Parsley
Salt
Black pepper
Walnuts or pecans
Vegetable oil
Olive oil
Rolled oats / dry oatmeal
Bran flake cereal
Whole wheat pretzels
Reduced fat Cheez-its
Lentils
Unsweetened applesauce
Reduced fat peanut butter
Light cool-whip
Non-fat vanilla yogurt
5 non-fat light yogurts
Non-fat or Neufchatel cream cheese
Bag of Carrots
Bag of Onions
Kale
2 Zucchini
Head of garlic
Tomato
Broccoli
Mushrooms
Yellow bell pepper
Eggs
Skim milk
Monterrey Jack, cheddar and mozzarella cheese – reduced fat or made w/ 2% milk
Reduced fat grated parmesan cheee
Reduced-sodium chicken broth (4 cans)
No-salt added diced tomatoes
Reduced-fat pesto
Pizza sauce
Black beans
Corn tortillas
Whole wheat elbow macaroni
Chicken, chicken and more chicken
Frozen turkey burgers

I do hope you'll follow along and at least enjoy some of these healthy recipes!

my friend Megan

I have known my friend Megan since 2nd grade. I am a natural extrovert and very loud, she is too but I doubt very many people know that. We met one fateful afternoon on the Wenonah School playground. She was the new kid in school, sitting on the swings by herself playing shy. I was beating up one of the boys or doing something else that I wasn’t supposed to, our teacher pulled me aside and sent me to go sit on the swings until I could behave. With my inability to sit still and keep quiet, we struck up conversation, I think I got Meg in trouble because I was supposed to be quiet, and so began our lifelong story as friends.

Megan is one of the smartest, funniest, and all-around wonderful people I have ever met. She’s been there for me when I’ve been down, fist-pumped with me in moments of glory and danced alongside me at my wedding. We’ve grown up together and I couldn’t be who I am today without having known her. But enough of the mushy stuff!! As stated, she is one of the funniest people I know; Megan is unintentionally hilarious and I love that about her. She holds 9 of the top 10 funniest moments in my life. This may be hard to understand for those of you that attended high school with us and voted her class angel, but Meg is no angel. Not that she’s a bad seed by any means; I guess you just have to know her to understand … or have lavender soap in your restroom.

Megan and Shannon (my other lifelong friend, whom I’ve known since 5th grade) came to TX to visit for a long weekend last year and I still laugh remembering all the individual moments. We drank outside on a patio in February (which was alien to my NJ friends), went shuffle skating around a honky-tonk, and overall had a fabulous weekend. Valentines’ Day was the best. We started out the day down in the West End having drinks for lunch then touring the grassy knoll and nearly getting killed as both Meg and Shan wanted to take pictures on the X’s in the street, despite the cars speeding through the triple underpass. After visiting the Sixth Floor Museum, we headed over to Grapevine and spent the next few hours drinking fabulous wines and laughing so hard that others started to stare. We met the “happily married woman,” aka the wine guy, and became fast friends. He kept giving us very large pours, which didn’t help our giggles. Meg kept telling us to drink hers, because she’d already had enough to drink, then would immediately take her glass back, telling us “that wasn’t an invitation b*tch” through her laughter. Please keep in mind that Meg rarely drinks, and even more rarely has more than a glass or two.

We wrapped up drinks at the winery and headed home, but not before seeing a random highchair in the middle of the sidewalk and deciding that it needed to go with us. Despite our best efforts, we were not able to fit the highchair into my trunk so we took a few pictures of Meg sitting in it and were off. Back at the house, Dan was such a good sport dealing with the three of us. He offered to drive to dinner (or so I’d like to believe); therefore, I decided to pop open one of the bottles I’d bought at the winery, Meg again telling us she didn’t want a glass but having one regardless. At dinner, Dan realized the hilarity of the situation … he was having dinner with not one but three (fairly tipsy) ladies, on Valentines’ Day. Oh how he wishes he hadn’t likened the situation to Big Love. From that point forward we all called him honey and did our best to embarrass him. After a mango margarita or three, and oh yea some food, the waiter cleared the table and we assessed the damage. We had queso everywhere!! Before closing out the night for good, Meg got lost on her way to the bathroom, had queso all over herself, and fell victim to peer pressure with yet another glass of wine when we got back to the house. We eventually all went to bed, but something happened and to this day we don’t know how … Meg awoke the next morning and came out to the living room and somehow, some way, she had red wine all down the back of her white shirt!!!! Did she take a glass to bed with her? We couldn’t find one in the room. Did she spill on herself earlier? She hadn’t changed for bed until we’d already finished our wine. So they mystery remains, how did Meg get wine all down her back?

So in honor of my friend Meg and her queso experience, here is the recipe for my favorite queso:
•1 can wolf brand chili, no beans – it has to be wolf brand, Hormel does not work!
•3-4 inches of velveeta – I use the kind made with 2% milk

Cube the velveeta into pieces that are about ½ inch by ½ inch or smaller; place in a microwave-safe bowl. Pour the chili over the velveeta and mix gently with a spoon. COVER WITH A PAPER TOWEL OR NAPKIN and microwave for 2 minutes, stir and heat for 2 minutes longer. Keep heating and stirring in 1-2 minute intervals until the velveeta is fully melted and the queso is mostly smooth. Serve with tortilla chips for dipping. (if you don’t cover with a paper towel while microwaving, you will have a lot of cleaning to do when you’re done)

when hell froze over

I live in Texas, the land of 100+ degree temperatures and 9 months of summer. I chose to live in Texas to get away from the snow and ice and miserably grey skies of Philadelphia. So please tell me why, what have I done to deserve this?? It just keeps snowing in Texas … we’ve had record snowfall this winter and now accuweather is saying it may snow again next week???

My very first winter in Texas, back in 2005, was “harsh” according to the locals. With temperatures dipping into the 30s and 1/100th of an inch of ice on the roads one morning in January, the Texans were screaming. I, on the other hand, was relishing in 30 degree temperatures; it felt balmy to me, a far cry from the winter of 2004 in Philly where we had temperatures in the single digits for what felt like an entire month (the winter that drove me to drive to Texas). My second winter was my first winter in our new home, I lovingly prepared hearty comfort foods in my new kitchen and built big, roaring fires on our new fireplace … I think the temperature dropped below 40 once. My third winter in Texas, I learned about the Texan interpretation of a sand truck. We received about 1.5-2” of snow, work closed due to road conditions, and I settled in on the couch to spend the day with the dogs watching Food Network and participating in the occasional conference call. Just as Ina Garten was placing her beautiful lemon tart into the oven, Fredo hopped up, ran to the front door, and gave a few of his big-dog barks. Gus followed suit and now I had both dogs barking like mad at the front door so of course I got up to see what was causing all this commotion. Heading very slowly down our street, was a Ford F150 with four guys in the back with shovels, shoveling out sand onto the asphalt as the truck drove slowly down the road. I nearly passed out from laughing so hard that I couldn’t breathe.

The winter of 2008/9 came and went, I really don’t recall much about it. And now here we are, the winter of 2009/10 started out great, I had taken the full week of Christmas off from work and spent every day at the park with the dogs, enjoying 70 degree temperatures and beautiful sunny afternoons, grilling dinner in the warm evenings. Then it happened, 4” of snow on Christmas Eve!!! I was not happy, not happy at all. So I did what any snowed in gal would do on Christmas Eve, we went to our neighbors, had a few big girl glasses (well the guys had beer) and drank hot buttered rums until the wee hours of Christmas morning. The snow quickly melted Christmas day and I thought it was all behind us.

Last week, we received the most snow the DFW area has ever received in a single day. Normally on a snow day, I don’t mind it so much because I can just putter about the house, do some cleaning, make a beef stew and bake some homemade bread while watching hour after hour of Food Network. However, this was no ordinary snow day; we lost power for almost 24 hours!!!! Home alone with the dogs and no power, I built a fire to keep the house warm and started brainstorming about what would make a good dinner. I thought back to mine and Dan’s first official/real date and decided I’d make fondue. So after reading almost an entire Twilight book and a good long nap with the dogs, I got everything together to make fondue. Unfortunately, when Dan got home, he wasn’t in the mood for fondue so we ordered pizza. We may not have had power, but at least the local Papa John’s did and they were willing to deliver. FML (well not really) I was craving fondue!

It all worked out a few days later. That Sunday afternoon, I was really craving a grilled cheese but we didn't have sandwich bread or sliced cheese. I did, however, happen to have a loaf of italian bread and bag of shredded cheddar (and of course beer) so I made fondue for lunch!

Recipe for beer cheese fondue:
•2 cups shredded cheddar
•2 cloves garlic, minced
•1 tbsp Dijon mustard
•1 ½ tbsp Worcestershire
•1 bottle dark beer, I like using Sam Adam’s Winter Lager or Bass Ale works too
•2 tsp fresh ground black pepper
•2tbsp flour

If you don’t own a double boiler, and I don’t, you can either do the make-shift way or the microwave way. The only difference is if you’re doing make-shift, use a metal or glass bowl; if microwave, don’t use metal.

Set a pot of water over a fondue flame or on the stove on medium-high heat to let the water gently boil, you don’t want it to boil too hard or you’ll burn yourself.
Pour the beer into a large bowl and mix in the garlic, mustard, Worcestershire and black pepper. Place the metal bowl over the pot of gently boiling water (pot must be smaller than the bowl so the bowl bottom doesn’t actually touch the water) and heat until the beer has warmed and is just barely simmering. Allow it to simmer for 5-7 minutes, stirring occasionally so it doesn’t bubble over. (microwave on high for 7-9 minutes until beer is simmering, stop it at 4 min to stir down the bubbles)

Lower the heat on the stove to low-medium and stir in the cheddar, ½ cup at a time, until it’s fully melted. Stir in the flour ½ tbsp at a time until the mix thickens and is nice and smooth; sometimes I only need 1tbsp, sometimes I need 3, just keep adding a little flour at a time until you get to the right consistency. (microwave, stir in cheese, microwave 30 seconds, stir, 30 seconds more, stir in flour, 1 min more, stir and you’re done … you don’t get the same perfect consistency with the microwave but it sure is a lot quicker). Serve hot, with bread and veggies for dipping!

like sands through the tooter-glass

We have two children, Alfred John and Augustus Jefferson. Our boys, who are known to most as Fredo and Gus-Gus, are the light of our lives. Gus is our people pleaser, the first to greet you when you visit and if you seem sad or angry, he's going to come sit by you and whimper and wag his tail until he's allowed on your lap to cuddle and give you kisses. Fredo is nuts, if there is a ball in the room then he has to have it and he will bring it to you 457 times to throw it before you get tired of playing fetch and finally put the ball out of sight. Fredo will also talk back to you when you tell him "no." At the dog park, Fredo runs with the cool crowd, tirelessly playing with all the other dogs; however, Gus would much rather spend time with the humans. Both make me smile and they are the absolute most entertaining dogs in the world. I can watch them chase each other through the yard for hours as one steals the toy from the other back-and-forth until my fat boy Gus gives up and comes inside to plop on the couch for a nap.

So since Sarah said my first story was too mushy about Dan, here's one that is mushy about my babies (and well, a little mushy about Dan):

Fredo came first; I adopted him from American Boston Terrier Rescue in August 2005 a mere two weeks before that fateful evening when I met Dan. Fredo is half Boston Terrier and half Blue Healer, he was the cutest little puppy in the whole wide world! He was so well behaved and potty trained in under a week. He was so cute that I was scared someone would steal him and therefore, fully trained him in Russian. If you said “sit” to him, he would cock his head to the side not understanding your request, but utter “see-dyesh” and the pup would sit gently in front of you and wait for his treat.

The first time Dan met Fredo, he was prepared to meet some itty bitty, teenie tiny Yorkie or Chihuahua puppy, his opinion based solely on where I was living at the time (Addison Circle). Dan got over his initial surprise and fell immediately in love with the “mini-healer,” which would be the first of many, many nicknames he’d assign Fredo through the years. At the time they first met, Dan was doing contract work while I was having a tough time handling a puppy and working 50-60 hours per week. It was a match made in heaven! While Dan would be gone for 12 hours or so on the days he had to work, on those off days, he spent his time with Fredo. We taught English commands to Fredo, as that was easier than teaching the Russian commands to Dan, and the boys quickly bonded. I’d come home from a long day at the office to my two boys: both exhausted from playing all day, both ready for me to cook dinner and both happy to see me come through the door … although I was never quite sure which of them was the happier one to see me.

Our days were perfect. I’d make dinner, we’d eat, then Dan would take Fredo on his after-dinner walk while I settled in to watch whatever reality television show that was airing. Some evenings, we’d take Fredo over to the park with a bottle of wine and let him frolic and play while we enjoyed a romantic evening under the stars. As Fredo was falling in love with Dan, Dan was falling in love with me, and I was falling in love with Dan and our new little family. Together, watching Fredo eat his first French fry and play with his first Halloween toy we really were becoming a family. Soon enough, Dan would move in with us and make it all official. Unfortunately, at the same time Dan moved in and changed our lives forever, his job changed as well and he now had a 40 hour work week. Fredo took some time to adjust but he seemed to handle it well as I was still working up the street and able to stop home for lunch to let him out and play.

Now that Fredo had more time to himself in the house; he earned his next two nicknames: the Fredomanian Devil and Fredo bin Laden. I learned quickly that artificial plants and trees were the way to go. A real tree or plant was just too much temptation for a dog that had been trained to lift his leg on trees, he didn’t know he was doing anything wrong, and as Dan assured me, it wasn’t his fault!! Oh that poor xmas tree never knew what was coming. I also learned that blue healers need room to run and lots and lots of exercise to get out all that puppy energy. A normal puppy has a ton of energy, a blue healer puppy can’t sit still … no really, they can’t, we tried but it just never worked. We came home from work and he terrorized Dan, his former best friend. Fredo wanted to play and romp and roam like they used to do but we only had that much time for him on the weekends. We tried our best, took him to the dog park every night after dinner and made sure to let him out again right before bed. Time passed, he calmed slightly but not completely and we had the discussion most parents eventually have: should we have another one?

I wanted to have another puppy, give Fredo a buddy, a comrade, someone to hang out with all the time. Dan agreed, but he thought we should get a house first, with a big yard for the two of them. Fredo was ok with apartment living but he was getting a little tired of the leash life. We got engaged and as our engagement present to Fredo, Dan promised we could get a puppy only if I could find a pup that was the same mix of breeds as our Fredo. It took me about a month of searching and a 5hr drive to Brown County Humane Society (and 6hr drive back), but we found our Gus-Gus. Gus was such an adorable little puppy, with an absolute love for playing hide and seek. We never could find that dumb dog, he was SO tiny, he could literally disappear behind and under anything and everything ... well except for his tail! Gus is a total sweetheart, but sadly, he's not so bright. His tail has a mind of it's own and it is rare that it's not wagging away. The tail gave away his hiding spot every time (and still does today). Gus will disappear and we will go searching through the house to find him and eventually see a blanket or pillow moving on it's own and know that there's our little Gus hiding. The best is how surprised he always is that we found him, his face perks up in amazement and he springs towards us with love and kisses!

And now that I sit here remembering what adorable little pups they were, I'm going to make them their favorite treat from when they were young: homemade peanut butter puppy treats :)

•2 cups whole-wheat flour
•1 tbsp. baking powder
•1 cup peanut butter (chunky or smooth, Gus-Gus prefers chunky)
•1 cup skim milk

Combine flour and baking powder in one bowl. In a different bowl, mix peanut butter and milk (a fork works best), then add to dry ingredients and mix really well. The first time I made this, I used that natural peanut butter which was hard to mix and I had pockets of flour when I went to roll it out, I wouldn’t suggest using natural peanut butter, good old fashioned Jiff or Peter Pan work just fine (reduced fat works fine too)

Place dough on a lightly floured surface and knead gently with your fists. Roll dough to 1/4 inch thickness and use a cookie cutter to cut out shapes … or do the lazy way and just roll it into balls then flatten between your palms. I’m crazy, and I know this, but I like to do shapes for whatever holiday it is so my dogs used to get shamrocks for St. Patty’s Day, stars for July 4th, hearts for Valentine’s Day and Snowmen all winter long.

Bake for 10-15 minutes at 375 on a just-barely greased baking sheet until lightly brown (careful, without all the normal additives and fat, these burn pretty quickly so watch closely)

These are best kept fresh if you store them in a Ziploc baggie or similar, if I leave them out in the treat jar they get stale and the dogs don’t want them anymore

Oh ... if you were wondering what other nicknames Dan has assigned the boys ...
Fredo is no longer the Fredomanian Devil but he does recognize: Fredolicious, Licious, Lisher, Lisher McGrisher, Biggun’, Big boy, Fredo-Frayed (like Flavor-Flav), Nubbin, Twinkle Toes and of course Sweetums
Gus-Gus also goes by the names: Gus, Gusser, Gussy, Gus-Gus Gusserson, Littlin’, Little boy, Tooter, Tootie, Stinky boy, Fat boy and also Sweetums

I can see the headline.... "Novice pregnant chef rushed to hospital for jalapeno mistake"

Here in Texas, you can buy fresh jalapenos at the supermarket all year long in the produce section, right there next to the carrots and celery. Fresh jalapenos are about 100,000 times hotter than the kind that you find in a jar back on the East Coast, and I’d never even seen one until I moved here. Now, they’re a staple in our diets and I can’t get enough! Oh, and they’re really good for you too!!

A friend of mine asked me for a good Mexican soup recipe, so I replied with my “safe” chicken tortilla recipe, not knowing the level of spice she wanted or her access to fresh jalapenos … can you get fresh jalapenos back East?

- 2 chicken breasts, baked and broken into pieces (I season them with a little chili powder or taco seasoning before baking), you can also get the Tyson already-cooked fajita chicken
- 5-6 cans or 3 boxes chicken broth (I usually buy 3 boxes and use about 2 ½, depends on how watered-down you want the spice)
- 1 large jar medium salsa
- 1 can diced tomatoes w/ green chilies (do not get the ro-tel brand, it is nasty)
- 1 can black beans, rinsed and drained
- 1 can mexi-corn (green giant makes this, it’s multi-colored corn), rinsed and drained
**side note – if you’re watching your sodium, make sure you rinse the canned beans/corn very, very well, the more you rinse off the liquid they were canned in, the less sodium you’ll get in your final soup**
- Chili powder
- Red pepper flakes
- Salt & pepper
- shredded cheddar or Monterrey jack cheese, sour cream
- Tortillas for tortilla strips, 1tbsp or so of canola oil

With the chicken, I find if you cut it up in perfect cubes with a knife, it doesn’t soak up the flavor as well as if you just break it into bite-sized bits with your hands so I typically just pull the breasts apart and some is in chunks, some a little shredded.

Just put it all in a big stock pot and let it simmer for at least an hour, the longer it simmers, the more the spices mingle and the spicier the soup gets, I love eating it the next day bc it’s so much better than the day I make it; I use a lot of chili powder and a good 2-3 shakes of red pepper flakes in mine bc I like it spicy but you can use however much to tailor to how spicy you want it. I’ll start everything else in the pot so it’s already hot when the chicken is ready to go in rather than wait on the chicken to start the soup. I like to give it a good stir every 20-30minutes or so to make sure all the little bits at the bottom make it through the broth for an even flavor.

You can buy flour or corn tortillas, I prefer corn, and I’ve found the easiest way to cut them into strips is with a pizza cutter: slice each tortilla into long thin strips then slice across cutting the tortilla in half (or quarters, depending on what size you buy); just warm a little canola oil in a skillet, very little oil, then fry up the tortilla strips until crispy and drain on paper towels. I like to throw a handful or two into the soup so they soak up the flavor, then use a few on top to garnish with the sour cream and cheese. The sour cream and cheese will also cut down some of the spiciness, so if you like spicy and others don’t, make the soup as spicy as you want and just put more sour cream in their bowls than in yours.
Well, she let me know that there was this fabulous place she used to go in Baltimore with Mexican soup so hot, it’d make her nose run, so I explained it was probably the type of chilies they put in their soup. You can certainly spice this soup up to the extreme simply by using a hot/spicy salsa and a super hot chili powder. But the absolute best way to spice this soup up while being flavorful is to use fresh jalapenos. (if you use fresh jalapenos, use a can of plain diced tomatoes without the green chilies)

If you can, buy two fresh jalapenos, the brighter/darker the green, the better the flavor; remove the seeds and dice them very, very finely. You do not want to be the person with a big chunk of jalapeno on your spoon, which is one spicy bite! You’ll want to be very careful not to touch your eyes or nose after dicing them until you’ve washed your hands a good dozen times (thanks Dan for teaching me this lesson). The easiest way to remove the seeds is to slice off the stem, slice in half length-wise and use a spoon to scrape out the guts, that way you’re limiting direct contact with your hands.

The last time I used fresh jalapeños, I had the teenie tiniest little papercut on my finger and it burned for a solid 4-5 hours even after I was done and had washed my hands a bunch of times!!! So be very careful if you use them.

After explaining all of this to my East Coast friend, I think my description of working with jalapenos scared her a little bit. In her response, she said she was going to try it based on my original recipe rather than go all out and make it super hot. Her direct quote was: I can see the headline... "Novice pregnant chef rushed to hospital for jalapeno mistake"

My history of life (and food)

I have loved food and have been cooking for as long as I can remember. For as far back as I can recall, Sundays were the highlight of my week. My father and I would make breakfast for the entire family (6 kids + 2 parents = 8 mouths and sometimes more if one of us had a sleepover!). He taught me how to make pancakes in the shape of Mickey Mouse, dinosaurs, E.T. and various other things which were awesome at the time, but I now realize they were actually pretty simple. As I grew into my pre-teens, I became obsessed with PBS and watching cooking shows. Mom didn't really let me cook much because she was scared I'd light the house on fire, as I was always a bit of a klutz, and still am today. I used to love fondue night growing up because I absolutely loved being able to cook my own dinner. Mom mostly cooked out of necessity, she made quick and easy (and bland) meals because she really didn't have much time to slave over the stove when she had 6 kids all in different sports and never all at the same school at the same time due to the vast range in ages between the oldest and the youngest.

My parents always tried to instill in us the value of giving things a chance, and trying new things. We often went out to dinner and occasionally tried new cuisines. I remember my favorite was going to Benihana's! Watching the chef was mesmerizing, the quickness of the knives, the steam from the grill, I was sold ... I was going to be a chef. As I went through high school, I was put on the path towards a 4-year college. My parents encouraged me to study math and the sciences and cooking was literally put on the back burner and not considered (by them) to be a future career, they wanted me to be a doctor. My senior year of high school, I had fulfilled all of the requirements for graduation so I took Gourmet Cooking I as an elective. It was truly the only thing that kept me from skipping school, as it was the last period of the day. I was pretty terrible (ok VERY terrible) to start, but by the end of the year I could bake and decorate a cake, make a mean chicken stir fry, and even flip a pancake without dropping it on the floor. However, my fate was sealed as I had already been accepted to Franklin & Marshall College where I would spend the next 4 years of my life studying Government & Public Policy.

I wrapped up my years at good ol' F&M with a B.A., some fairly good writing skills, and a full understanding of the political spectrum but unfortunately, I didn't improve my cooking skills much at all due mostly to the very limited budget of a college student and the uncanny ability to consume ramin and Easy Mac on a daily basis without complaint. I had been accepted to Rutgers for graduate school so I was heading home to live with Ma and Pa for awhile, due to the limited budget of now a graduate student.

For that first month that I lived at home after college graduation, I couldn't find a job and was bored out of my mind. So I did what any bored person would do, I kept myself busy. I typically rolled out of bed around 10am, flipped on PBS or whatever channel was airing a cooking show (mom only had basic cable) and watched the world's best chefs create masterpieces while scarfing down my Captain Crunch. Then, I'd leaf through a few of my mother's cookbooks (Betty Crocker circa 1973), head over to the grocery store and spend the entire afternoon cooking these fabulous 4-5 course meals while mom looked on, thankful she wasn't boiling yet another pot of spaghetti for dinner.

Monday night might be Mexican night, I'd make tortilla soup and a salad topped with tortilla strips and a southwestern ranch to start, followed by cheesy quesadillas. For the main course, I'd make a pan of chicken enchiladas and a pan of beef enchiladas (dad doesn't eat chicken), with black beans, Mexican rice and corn on the side. When all that was done and the pants' buttons undone, we'd have sopapillas for dessert. Tuesday would come and maybe I'd make Tuesday night Asian night and stir fry some steak with peppers, onions, carrots and the like all drenched in a honey teriyaki crafted from scratched and served alongside the fried rice I'd seen demonstrated that morning, closing the meal with bananas tempura (fried in mom's Fry Daddy) with vanilla ice cream and a honey drizzle. Perhaps on Wednesday, I'd recreate the Italian feast showcased on epicurious.com with a tiramisu for dessert. I'd truly found my passion and loved every day of it, even more than my mother loved not having to cook. However, as was the theme throughout this time in my life, I was broke and I had to get a job.

I went to work for what would be the first of many years working in the mortgage industry and spent my summer working my butt off trying to get as much overtime as possible to save and get out of my parents' house. Summer ended, fall semester started, and I was taking a double course load plus an internship. The closest I came to cooking might've been heating some soup at 2am when pulling an all-night study session. Spring semester ended and I went back to the mortgage company, but in a much better position than I'd been before. When fall finally arrived, I only had a few more courses to take so I was able to schedule those in the evenings so I could still work full-time and finally move out of my parents' house.

I left one mortgage company for another, moved from NJ to Philadelphia, and was grateful to be out on my own. For the first time, I was really fending for myself. I had some roommates, but they were guys, they didn't cook or grocery shop or anything. Over the winter break from school, I started really cooking again. I'd come home from work, call my sister (who lived just a few blocks away) and start fixing dinner. She'd run to the store to pick up whatever wine I told her to get and we'd have dinner together, talk about our day and watch whatever reality tv show that happened to b eon. **side note: this is also where I fell in love with reality tv** When the spring semester started, I only had one class left to graduate so I cooked 4 nights per week, watched a lot of reality tv and cooking shows, and really enjoyed myself. I was also a serial dater during this "single-gal in the city" phase of my life and oh man did I love going on dates to new restaurants! Almost every Saturday was a new restaurant and a new cuisine. My absolute favorite restaurant, to this day, is on a scary little dimly lit side street in Philadelphia. It is called Marrakesh and they serve the most amazing Moroccan dishes I have ever had in my life! I took my husband there the very first time he visited the East Coast and while he wasn't such a fan of eating with his hands, he very much agreed with me on taste.

I wrapped up graduate school, received my Masters degree, and was now bored yet again. I spent the summer wasting my time working at the mortgage company and spending my weekends down at the Jersey Shore in Avalon. I cooked occasionally, here and there, but summertime on the East Coast for a 24 year old girl is more about partying and having fun than staying home and cooking dinner. Winter came and it was a cold one, lots of snow. For those of you unfamiliar with the Manayunk section of Philadelphia, where I was living, I would liken the hills to those of San Francisco ... imagine San Fran being buried in 2 feet of snow overnight. I awoke one freezing cold February morning to yet another foot of snow that had fallen overnight. I walked straight into my company's HR department and stated "we have offices in Georgia, Texas, Florida and two in California. Please pick one and send me." And so began my journey to Dallas, TX. I threw my clothes in the back of my car, drove to Texas and started my life all over again.

Once in Texas, living by myself, I started cooking again. I only lived here a short while when I met Dan, my husband. From the day we met, we haven't spent a day apart unless I was traveling. Cooking for him became my passion and the joy in my day, finally I found someone as obsessed with food as me!! He took me to new restaurants to learn all about Texan and Southwestern styles of spice and cooking which I would then carefully recreate at home. I stayed with my mortgage company for about a year when I saw it on the horizon, the mortgage industry was flailing and I knew I had to get out ... but mortgage was all that I knew! Well that and anything you ever wanted to know about our political system. I threw together my resume and decided to finally put my graduate school education to good use. I began working at a new company, in a new industry, and spent a lot of time studying and working long hours getting myself acclimated in my new world, but not a lot of time cooking. Time passed, I got the hang of things, Dan and I got engaged, bought a house, moved to the suburbs, got married and then I finally started cooking again.

Dan and I have been together nearly 5 years now, married almost 3, and every day is still an adventure. He knows me better than anyone and is my favorite critic. He is always there, willing to try a new recipe I created and pushing me to try new spices and wrap more things in bacon. He doesn't blink when I purchase the Betty Crocker 200-piece cake decorating kit "just because" or when I come home with bags of ingredients, none of which he'd ever heard of before. I told him the other day that I wanted to be a tv chef and he said "ok" like he already knew it before I said it. Hopefully, this spurs another adventure for us to enjoy together.

Must run, big girl glass is full and it's not going to drink itself!

Welcome to my life ...

I want to be a tv chef. I've never wanted anything more in my entire life. But the funny part is, I didn't even know that this is what I wanted to be until about a month ago. It makes sense, I've always loved food, cooking, and helping others. I just never put it all together in my head until I recently tried out for (and didn't get) a reality show to become a real chef.

Not that I really thought I'd get picked, but now I know what I want to be when I grow up; and as I near my 30th birthday, I just don't know what to do. Friends have been urging me to blog for years to tell the stories of what I consider to be a pretty regular existence that they for some reason find hilarious and entertaining. So now I sit here on my couch, having my big girl glass and typing my thoughts so that maybe someone important will see this and give me my very own show.

I hope anyone reading this at least enjoys the recipes that I plan to include in my postings. I have three main strengths in the kitchen: turning grandmom's comfort foods into healthy meals with little recipe substitution, cooking gourmet meals on weeknights, and creating sunday feasts that take an entire day of preparation and cooking that could wow even the pickiest of critics. I hope to showcase those talents while thrilling you with little stories about my life, mostly about my husband Dan, my blog's namesake and quite possibly the funniest person I know. You'll also get to know entirely too much about my dogs, Fredo and Gus, that we swear have human personalities and whose thoughts we enjoy providing to one another.